Tagged

Thanks to Shamaine, I've been tagged.

SUPERHERO

1. Superhero power I want: To teleport and fly
2. Why? : Well then I can pretty much go wherever I want can I?
3. Downside of this power : I have no way to protect myself aside from teleporting and flying away.
4. My superhero nickname : Zanity
5. My motto : Elsewhere in a flash
6. Sworn Enemy : unknown
7. Official vehicle : I fly and teleport. Why would I need a car?
8. Day job : Politician

10 Things About Me That Might Freak You Out

1. I have this proposal where I want my kids to be chubby. But when they turn 12 I'll send them to fat camp so that they develop this "I used to be fat so people used to make fun of me in result to that I have a down to earth" attitude. Yeah I know, crazy.
2. I've been in a drug bust. Refer here.
3. I go to strip clubs to grade the dancers' performance.
4. I don't really like garlic because of the after taste.
5. I enjoy eating steak or any kind of meat like a savage.
6. I like doing laundry but I hate ironing clothes.
7. I only like cats that are not friendly.
8. I talk to myself. Correction: selves.
9. I am not afraid of death
10. I can't poo in silence. There's always got to be water running or something.

And since I am kind, I am not tagging anyone.

Oh wait, I changed my mind. Maybe I'll tag No.1 and Sri Rama. Have fun!

:P

From Private To Public

I've had this question at the back of my mind since I put this place on private because of that old stalker two years ago:

Should I consider putting this thing back on public domain?

Yes? No?

I mean, you know how 'private' these thoughts are right? But then again, these thoughts are at the end of the day shared with a select few who know my web address. But if you google this blog, thou shalt not find me.

However, a few days ago I was cruising through my site meter and I noticed the site referred to get here was from this place called Nuffnang.

I was like, WTF is Nuffnang?

And yes, out of curiosity, I googled it. And you can check them out here.

But I'll spare you the boring details by giving a brief description: its basically a site that uses other people's blogs to advertise. In other words, if Nokia believes that Nuffnang may generate revenue for them, they may sign up and Nuffnang will do the sorting of which ads to put that would/could be relevant to the blogger's blog.

It's like Google's Adsense. You know, those things at the side when you try and search for whatever? And they write like "sponsored links" bla bla bla?

Yeah, that shit.

Anyways, people like Kenny Sia and Xiaxue are making some sweet moolah out of this concept I think. And on top of that, they get all these interesting free stuff and shit. So the concept is, the more famous your blog, the more money you make.

Interesting eh?

And all you have to do is sit at home and just write some shit that seems exciting. Just like Maddox who writes some pretty interesting shit. Or Tuckermax. And so many other people who channel their thoughts online. Me.

But back to the people who are with Nuffnang. Well, I never knew one's private thoughts could make money. And specifically referring to Malaysia, like how much are these bloggers really making from this shit? And how are they roping in corporate companies like Citibank and Nokia to sign up with them? Do people actually click on these advertising links?

Because I sure as hell don't.

I mean, advertorial writing is one thing. But these are my thoughts. My opinions. What would my article on wanting to meet a Chinese Jew or my silly bedtime short stories have to do with these companies and their products?

The power marketing baby! There's always something for everyone! There's always a way to wheel them in!

Ah, the world of advertising.

Anyways, the point is, should I consider putting this thing back on public domain and at the same time join the Nuffnang group?

Are my thoughts worth money?

But most of all, are they suitable enough for the public domain?

And most of the most important of all, can I handle random people reading my shit and leaving potentially annoying comments on the things I write about?

Hmmm.

Stalin Tickled Me, Disturbingly

So I bought this book called World Famous Dictators a few weeks ago for sheer entertainment.

I mean I don't know why but I have this deep fascination for dictators. My question towards their dictatorship has always been; how the hell did they do it?

Anyways, the opening of Stalin's profile in this book tickled me. Disturbing as it seems I can't help but laugh a little at Stalin's frankness on how he sees things.

This note to his head of secret police, Lavrenty Beria wrote:

My dear Beria,

I find that this morning I accidentally mixed up today's list of counter-revolutionary traitors with my list of people to whom I wish to send birthday cards this month, one of the latter being my beloved mother. If you have not already sent the death list out to the execution squads, I would appreciate it if you would remove the birthday list and return it to my office. If, on the other hand, the execution orders have been carried out, I commend you on your efficiency and suggest you to add your own name to tomorrow's execution list.

Stalin

I am sorry I know this is wrong but HAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Stalin is definitely one hell of a character.

I mean, wow. That's all I can say, WOW.

This note pretty much sums up his stance on traitors (that he would kill them), his thoughtfulness (through a list of birthday wishes to send), his love for his mother (by wanting to send her a birthday card), his good leadership skills (by commending Beria if he was efficient) and his straight upness if you fuck with him (through telling Beria to put himself on the list if he had sent out the execution list)!

I mean, wow! Ruthless and nice!

This note just proves that Stalin possesses human niceness.

Just like Hitler who was a painter and PolPot who was a teacher; despite their ruthless orders to kill so many they all still have qualities of human 'nice' ness in them.

Isn't that creepy?

Disturbingly!

The World Economy (Sadly) Needs The US To Survive

I am so sleep screwed these days it is almost thoroughly annoying.

Anyways.

With all these "verge of recession" predictions, the US has sure sparked some major chain of reactions throughout the world.

Stock markets around the world are plummeting. Oil prices rising. US dollar weakening. Food shortage predictions?

Wow.

The media sure knows how to create panic.

But really my question for the day is : why does the world rely so much on the US economy to make their own country's economy prosper?

Most importantly, how did the US become the super power of the world?

It's like the world can't survive without them. It's like if US doesn't do well, so won't the rest of the world. Which means if they fuck up, so will everyone else creating this chain reaction of shit creek. Did you know that the US have their little porky investment fingers in virtually probably 90% of the world? And I don't need to find reference towards this because it is evident everywhere.

Even in Japan!

I've always regarded the Japanese to be in their own lala bubble world.

But honestly? They're not really.

After discovering from my Pacific and Asian class that the US was the one who helped repaired the Japanese economy by contributing massive amounts of funds during the Cold War, I was appalled.

I mean, FYI, it was the US and their allies that destroyed them after WWII.

But because the US was at war with the Soviet Union (refer to: the Cold War) they were trying their best to avoid the spread of Communism and with China at that point declaring themselves as a Communist state, I think the US didn't want this to happen to Japan and the rest of Asia Pacific either because: where would they stuff their lil investment porky fingers in Asia otherwise?

To be fair, Japan was not exactly a bunch of Communist friendly group either.

I mean, the government at that time was trying their best to suppress anything that had to do with equality in the working class. I mean, these were a bunch of people who were all for finance capital so that their economy would prosper allowing them to increase their military arms (refer to: how Japan sparked the Pacific War).

However, with the damage the US had done to them during WWII, they were almost out of capacity to do shit making their people (those of the working class) a little unhappy.

So the Japanese welcomed the US (sort of unwillingly) in order to fix Japan.

And as Japan is known to be the leading economy in the Asia Pacific, it is only natural for other countries to follow suit. Which also meant the US would have a chance to stick their little porky fingers in the rest of Asia Pacific too.

It's called a chain of events.

Clever cunning United States.

But how did the US managed to be so cunning when they were just a bunch of migrates from Europe?

I mean really, this idea of Americansim is all made up in the media. The American Dream. Land of opportunity. Star Spangled Banner.

Despite the media hype, I am not going to disagree with their idea of promoting patriotism. I mean, its pretty much the main reason that Americans are so proud of their own country. In fact they're so proud that they're so ignorant towards the rest of the world too.

But despite their ignorance, so many people have gone there to make their lives better you know?

So, I can't really say that the US is a shit country altogether.

But this pride has also made them not be able to see that exploiting/invading other countries is not cool. They are so set that they have to be the ultimate super power that rules the world economy that they can't imagine seeing anyone else being at par with them.

Even the UK, kisses their ass (Refer to: Tony Blair supporting the Iraq and Afghanistan war).

What the hell man?

I am just so fascinated as to how the Americans did it? How did they cunningly put their little porky investment fingers into so many countries of the world? How did they become the main 'influence'? The chain reactor? The one that starts the fire?

How?

In regards to this I honor people like Fidel Castro who have not given in to the US influence.

I fear that when Fidel dies, things will change in Cuba and perhaps, at long last, the Americans will finally get to them. But while he still survives, I honor him. And I honor those who are brave enough to not rely on the US to expand their economy. I honor those who do not kiss ass to the United States because evidently their ass is so big it's pretty much everywhere and to be able to avoid it, is definitely commendable.

But then again, they are the ones with the money.

If only the world has the capacity to build their economy without their help.

If only.

Padan Muka BN

This is what you get for not listening to the people.

This is what you get for not being a tyrant like Tun Dr. Mahathir.

Sometimes being strong headed and authoritative has its benefits. I am not saying it is correct. But a weak leader equals to the people having lack of confidence towards the administration.

Anyways, whatever.

I think the fact that BN lost so many states against the opposition is a good thing. It's something new after oh so long. Scary but exciting. I can't wait to see what's going to happen over the next four years.

Hopefully, we will actually see the end of economic and education inequality which is incredibly evident in Malaysia.

Hopefully, we won't see another May 13th.

Hopefully, we Malaysians, are civil enough to not have another lame racial outbreak.

Anyways, I couldn't exercise my right to vote despite trying in every power to do so.

So I decided to write a letter to the PM from the website they built which in my opinion is hilarious. But nonetheless it is also interesting and I am curious to know if he (or his representative at least) will reply or not. If he does I will definitely post his reply here.

So here's what I wrote:

Hi. If I wanted to talk to you personally PM, there will be too many things to say so let me just tackle one issue first: why can't I vote while I am here abroad? I am a registered voter in Malaysia. I specifically went to the post office to register just like you lot told me to so I could exercise my rights. And I am here now abroad wanting to know how to vote but none of your govt representatives here in Canada have replied me as to how to go about this. Eventually, I received a reply from the Malaysian Student Rep. in Canada who said I needed to email my mailing address and my full name to maribel@kln.gov.my in order to sort things out. But they never got back to me. It's ridiculous. This is ridiculous. Why are your people so disorganized? I am the voice of tomorrow and here you are making me feel like you guys ARE hopeless. FYI, I was going to vote for BN because I've always thought they have been doing a fabulous job. And I don't care if I tell people this because I DID believe in you guys! But why couldn't I vote despite being abroad? Why did your people not get back to me? I don't understand. Please enlighten me. I look forward to your reply. Thank you.

This was written prior to the elections results.

So now that the results are out, well, I guess this letter is all deserving for him.

So, padan muka BN. Next time, pay attention to the people instead of drowning yourself in corruption.

Yay!

Etcetera, Etcetera, Etcetera

Okay, so have you lot seen the various versions of Anna and the King? Also might be known as The King and I or even Anna and the King of Siam? Yeah, ya'll know which films I am referring to right?

Basic storyline : British woman comes to Siam to teach King Mongkut's children English and she is appalled by his 'foreign' behavior and wishes to 'correct' him and in some versions they fall in love "etcetera etcetera etcetera"? <--If you haven't seen the 1950s version you wouldn't understand my etcetera joke.

Anyways, it doesn't matter because I hate them.

ALL OF THEM.

They're all stupid.

Why?

Because these are films that are Hollywoodized.

In other words, films that the Western world think ancient Thailand was supposed to be like. I mean seriously, if you watched the older versions you'll probably agree that they completely insulted the Thai royal family along with its people.

I can't stand it when directors from the West try to make films about Asia. It's too, I don't know, Hollywood?

Maybe I've been watching too many South East Asian films in my class.

But this Anna and the King bothered me the most because there are so many versions to it and when one compares and contrasts over the decades of versions made, STILL ANNOYING.

First of all, the King is not even Thai. In fact, 90% aren't even Thai. Hence their Thai accents are AWFUL. I am not a Thai but I've seen Thai films and you can totally tell in all these films that these people aren't Thai.

Specifically referring to the 1999 version (which was shot in Malaysia) I'd like to ask, how the hell can Chow Yun Fat play the king? His Thai accent is so off I almost wanted to puke. Even when he speaks English as the King of Mongkut I can still tell that he's not Thai! It's like some Hong Kong superstar trying to speak Thai with a Chinese accent!...Wait a minute...IT IS!

ERGH.

And what annoys me more is that there are Malaysian actors in the 1999 version. And even they didn't get the Thai accent too right. Apa ni wey? Neighboring country's accent also cannot imitate ah?

Fine fine fine. Thai IS a hard accent to acquire. It is so soft and languid even I don't think I can imitate it and as far as I know I am pretty darn good at imitating accents. So maybe we should ask Thai actors to remake the film. Would that then do justice to the horrendous versions of these films for the past decades? Most likely.

But the problem is: I don't think the Thai people are too happy about the storyline in the first place. Because it basically shows King Mongkut trying to be a kiss ass to the West, a womanizer, "etcetera, etcetera, etcetera".

In fact, the 1999 version was banned in Thailand . Heh.

So how lah?

Jawapannya : DON'T EVER MAKE ANY MORE VERSIONS TO THIS FILM! EVER. SERIOUSLY, NO MORE HOLLYWOOD, NO MORE!

THE END

CLOSE BOOK

CLOSE SHOP

FIN!

My 200th Post

Yup. 200th post. Clearly, I have a lot of shit in my head.

So let's take a break on typing for a second and check out what sitting on the computer so much has done to my fingers.

This is my computer keyboard. My index finger is perpetually placed on that area as it is where the mouse is.

And this is my finger now. Dented!

Well, to be fair my finger isn't always like that. But when I'm online really long (which I am), this is what it looks like. This is the finger of a computer nerd and mouse extremist on your typical night.

Lovely innit?

Gender Roles

I recently had a class that basically talks about the tortures that were going on in the Abu Ghraib prison, Iraq.

Before this, I didn't know much about it. I mean I heard about it but didn't know anything in detail.

It happened in 2004. And I was trying to think where was I at that point in my life and it made me realize how ignorant I was about current events at that point in my life. Forgive me world.

Anyways, thanks to my Gender & Politics class, I have been introduced thoroughly to the subject matter. Trying to 'unpack' what the photos represent in gender terms is rather fascinating.

First and foremost, gender is something that separates female and male. But it doesn't just separate us. What my class is trying to make me understand is that it is socially constructed. That society created what our gender is supposed to be like. That we are pretty much tied down to what we are supposed to be within our genders because society has constructed it to be so.

Be it in the West or in Asia, your gender affects almost every situation you go through.

I mean, in the Abu Ghraib case, there is a picture of Lynndie England (one of the soldiers involved in the controversy) holding a leash. On the leash was a naked male prisoner. With her short hair and that cigarette in her mouth and that leash, what does this say about the women of today?

Image taken from Wikipedia

Women for centuries have been fighting for equality. From voting rights, to land rights, to employment rights; you name it they've talked about it.

In general, women are regarded as the weaker sex while men are often portrayed as the ones who are violent, aggressive, warmongering etc.

But what does this photo of Lynndie England prove now?

That women too can torture in inhuman ways?

Could these photos mean that men and women are finally equal?

That women are finally liberated to become just like men?

In this day in age, gender roles have reversed in several places. And in a lot of ways I like that concept. Reversing gender roles perhaps will help men understand women better and women understand men better instead of generalizing the stereotypical roles that have been embedded in us for thousands of years.

However, there's too much complications when dwelling into this idea of trying to understand male and female and their gender roles as a whole. We need to consider religion, culture and location to really understand all this too.

I mean come on, it ain't fair to say that "we are liberating the women of Afghanistan from wearing their covers [burqa]" is it? This was one of the many STUPID things said by George Bush as one of the reasoning of going to war in Afghanistan.

Bush's idea of freeing the women in Afghanistan is downright silly. I mean we all know he's a douchebag but what this really shows us is that there is a lack of understanding and tolerance of other religion and cultures. This really messes things up; especially if we let our bias slip in. In Bush's case, his ideology was that a woman in a Burqa was not 'free' to wear what she wants without understanding that maybe she chose to wear it because it is in her religion?

I look at Malaysia and I look at the tudung girls. As much as I condemn those who wear tudung and slut around, it is at the end of the day, her choice to be a slut and wear a tudung. As much as it is immoral, only God can judge her.

But my bias towards this would still go, shit that's sick and hypocritical. Might as well not wear tudung. Sigh. This is probably because I live in a Muslim society that portrays non tudung girls as sluts and those who wear tudung to be 'better'.

So evidently, it pisses me off when I find out these tudung girls are doing the same thing.

So you get what I am trying to say right? That we can't simply be quick to assume what is deemed to be 'right' for our genders without looking at religion, culture and of course, location?

Its a complicated process I swear.

Vivid Dream

I just had the most vivid dream ever.

About 15 minutes ago, I woke up.

But before I awoke, I had a dream that I died.

Now mind you, I have dreamed that I've died before. Mostly me falling off some cliff or building but this was different. It was a motorcycle accident.

Why I was on a motorcycle I will never understand. Because initially, I thought I was walking.

But I was walking so fast, zooming against traffic. I can vividly remember the road. What looked like Douglas st. suddenly morphed into Jalan Ampang. There was so many cars and motorcycles on this 5 lane road. And I was trying to go against it. I saw so many faces but none that I knew. They were all honking at me of course as I went faster.

I was moving faster and faster and suddenly I stopped just before what looked like the corner where you would turn on to Jalan Tun Razak. And all I could see was the road and the busy traffic still moving but not me. And then I smelt it. Blood. And then my heart felt like something pulled me out of my body. There was this smoosh sound as this thing pulled me out. It was weird I could feel the pain as I got pulled out and floated away.

Then I looked down I saw the motorcycle. It was a maroon and white kapcai.

And then I saw me; my lifeless head. My head was detached from my body. And my dead eyes was still open with a shocked expression.

And all I remember thinking as I was floating away was, "Shit, Why did I do that? Why would I go so fast without even thinking? And now I am dead?"

And then I woke up.

How fucking descriptive was that?

Damn, the human mind is scary!

WTF!?!?! Early Elections!?!!

Mahai Chao Cibai Weeeeyyy...

Elections will most likely be held in early March and I am here? After all my effort of waiting at the post office to flippin' register last year they do it while I am here in o Canada? I thought it was going to be in May where I would have returned back home?

Cibai!

I've emailed the consulate in Vancouver and Ottawa to see how to go about this.

They haven't got back to me. I hope they're not trying to sabotage me from voting.

Actually, I had a dream where I went to a website and it said that I couldn't vote in my constituency or some shit like that. And the links were really weird. Like I could vote not just in one area but three areas. But then all of the areas said i could not vote except for one and it said 'free vote'. Symbolic maybe?Yeah, I have been having some seriously weird dreams.

Anyways, I don't know which party to vote for just yet.

I used to just want to vote for BN cos they've been doing such a good job. Or better than others. Though this is quite bias to say as it has been the only dominating party for like, ever.

But a lot of the younger people in Malaysia are condemning BN these days due to the lack of leadership skills in our current Prime Minister. They find him weak and too controlled by his lovely son in law. I find him to be a charming chap really. Pompous arrogant prick on the most, but charming.

So who do we vote for?

IF I vote, I will base my vote towards the policies that would be most beneficial to the people of Malaysia. I find that sometimes we are too engrossed in the candidate's personality we forget what policies they are campaigning for.

But it's like that worldwide i.e Obama and Clinton. Who here knows what exactly each candidate is campaigning for? I mean, the media doesn't cover it as much as they cover the question of would you vote for the woman or the black guy? (But more so pointing towards the woman thing because race is a more sensitive issue than gender apparently) Hmmm.

Talking about race, as far as I am concerned, I am looking for a party that will abolish Bumiputera rights. A party that promises to reduce the benefits that the Malays have if not yet completely end them. I am not saying start immediately but slowly. Like, bit by bit. Let's start with education equality in universities. We should let more non-Malays enter. I mean, it's not fair to have a Malay quota. I mean, what the hell is that?

It should be a Malaysian quota.

We should also probably get rid of the question of race when filling up any official government form. Like, the fact that there's Malay, Indian, Chinese and Others is so dividing. Why do we need to know our ethnicity when we fill up official forms? It kind of promotes race separation don't you think? I mean besides statistics purposes what's the point? Especially when one applies for a local university in Malaysia. Why should anyone need to say what race they are? Because of the quotas? But I thought education should be equal to all?

Of course all this talk of abolishing Bumi rights would piss a whole lot of Malays.

I mean it's like one day someone decides to take their security blanket away. But I am not saying we take the whole blanket away! I am saying share the blanket!

Okay, imagine this: The color of the blanket represents the benefits each races are receiving.

Currently, the color of the blanket is totally blue which I will use as representing the Malays.

But in reality, there are other colors needed to be added onto the blanket because there seems to be preference of different colors on the blanket. Red can represent the Chinese (so cliche I know but grasp the concept please) and Indians green and 'Others' for now, will be pink.

So all these colors need to be added to the blanket equally without making one color more dominant than the other.

Get it?

What I am suggesting is we should start by snipping little bits and pieces of blue away and knit in some new colors onto the blanket.

Get what I am saying?

This is so that the blanket will eventually look colorful and we will ACTUALLY embrace the fucking concept of equality for all races. Does that make sense?

I know, easier said than done.

In reality, we need to conduct more research and hire experts from our generation to implement the logic in these policies so people can understand that this colorful blanket idea ain't that bad. I think that's all these HINDRAF protesters want anyway.

I mean, at the end of the day the point of the government is to maintain stability amongst the people as well as govern the country towards prosperity and all that jazz. And well, this whole vision 2020 shit ain't going to work if you just let the Malays dominate everything. We need some equality here. I thought the idea was standard of living improves better if ALL is helped? This Malay domination kind of reminds me of the whole white superiority shit (which I totally despise) in North America. I mean, why can't we be unprejudiced?

Why ah?

Yeah, it's the whole "I am better than you" mindset shit.

Perhaps we should stop saying "I am better than you and I will conquer all" and instead say "oh wow you are pretty darn awesome too, maybe we should work together so we can all be happy together". I mean, whats up with all the negativity in making the none superior race feel like shit? Why can't we all have the same prosperity as others?

WISHFUL THINKING kan?

Bugger!

For The Men Out There

So, today is Valentine's Day.

Big fucking deal.

Valentine's Day is overrated and since I've been reading all these books about how men are socially constrained for my gender and politics class, I'm making today my What I Like About Men Day instead as a token of appreciation towards men.

So here are some things I like about the men I've met, so far:

• I like asking them questions about their field of interest. and they get so into telling me about it. It's so cute that they're so excited about their work.
• I like how men are great to be friends with.
  
• I like how they aren't like women.
• I like their practicality and their straight upness with situations.
  
• I like how men look in the morning when they wake up. scruffy sleepy eyed and all, it's refreshing for me.
• I like how they speak highly of their mother. even if she is a bitch.
• I like watching men sleep. its probably the only time that they are not trying to 'be a man'.
• I like how they have their guys night out. when i see my brother and his guy friends hang out, i feel that bond that they have. and it's so inspiring.
• I like how they try to take care of themselves. it's sometimes sloppy, but the effort counts.
• I like how men act all protective in the outside world but at night in bed they want to cuddle with you.
• I like the voice of a man. it soothes my ears.
• I like that men have cocks. and that their penetration feels 100 times better than any dildo because it is accompanied by his emotions, his kisses, his hands. its skin to skin.
• I like how men are limited with expressive words (compared to women) but when they say something meaningful its like, wow, where did that come from?
• I like how they try to live up to being what is supposed to be 'a real man'. It's so fascinating.
• I like that they ask me what i think. and listen.
• I like that sometimes they don't listen. and then get it wrong and then have that adorable foolish face. ah, such a cutie.
• I like how they look at me.
• I like how they have this aura of wanting to give as much as possible to you because society expects them to when really, they don't need to; which is why I also admire them for being able to.
  
• I like how serious their face is when they tell you something important. you totally get sucked in and everyone else in the world disappears.
• I like how they can make me laugh. men are definitely funnier than women.
• I like how they come up with a lot of philosophical thoughts and ideologies.
  
• I like the random crap that runs through their minds. that's what makes them funny.
• I like when they laugh at my jokes.
• I like that they know how to appreciate meat.
• I like how they love to eat too.
  
• I like the fact that despite the amount of men bashing going on in the media, they still love you. they are so patient with society.
• I like that they have a drive in what they want to achieve.
• I like how they sometimes shut off everything and actually have nothing specific in their mind. sometimes I wish women could just switch their minds off, but we can't.
• I like how they hold you.
• I like how they are subtle but deeply sincere.

I could go on and on but at the end of the day, men are just as awesome as women. For better or worst, we need men and men need women. It's the circle of life.

I'm not saying there aren't some sucky men out there. There are definitely sucky men out there like FO SHIZZLE. But then, it's not fair to say that ALL men suck. Irregardless of them being retarded and violent and abusive and all that we still need them. And surely the reason they became all that aggressive and shit was because of the upbringing i.e a man can never really act like a girl which is to show emotions because 'it's not right'.

Come on, tell me you have never encountered a time when someone said to you, it's not right for you to do this because society doesn't accept it. Surely you have.

Hence, Happy What I Like About Men Day!

Let's celebrate this day by telling every guy we know that they are fuckin' awesome!

xoxo

TWO YEARS!

Okay so usually I don't like writing more than once a day but today, I have to write another post because:

OMG LOL WTF BBQ ROTFL ZOMG!n!o1ONE!!! ITS BEEN TWO YEARS SINCE I'VE WRITTEN IN THIS THINGY!

I mean wow!

I know I usually like to celebrate with the amount of posts I've written but well, it was mostly because I missed the first anniversary (or rather, didn't notice the date) of my first ever post.

So, yeah!

YAY!

But of course, this post then deserves another good look at the fucking awesome, ME. Haha.

Me

And me

And me again, rocking on! Hellz yeaaaaahhh!

xoxo

Naz

A Trooper's Words

A Happy Trooper

Bahaahahahahahaahaha.

I just want to say, don't mess with a trooper because they CAN and WILL bring you down if you mess with them.

I can't believe how hilarious me and my trooper buddy totally brought down the so-called strong fort of he who will not be mentioned.

A word of advice guys, be careful, there are some girls out there who are Cleopatras and Joan of Arcs and the likes and will screw you over if you screw with them. So don't mess. And girls, be punctilious of the guys that claim to be Caesar and Napoleon Bonaparte. They're going to try to bring you down and one will need to be on guard.

But if you're a trooper, you WILL bring them down!

Bahahahaha.

Okay, it's not like I am anti-men or anything. I am just saying that some people out there think they can walk all over you. And I don't think that's fair is it? Especially if you thought that person was someone so awesome and was civil enough to not screw you over.

But alas, God is great and these days you don't have to wait for hell to screw you over.

Because some Trooper will!

Haha.

JUICE!

Okay, it's so funny how my previous post referred to my old posts because coincidentally, this post is one of those posts too!

Hehe.

If you don't know what juice I am referring to:

Refer Here

And for those of you who do, I FINALLY KNOW WHY THEY SAY IT ALL THE TIME!!!!

Hahahaha.

JUICE means:

Join Us In Creating Excitement! = JUICE!

How did I find this out?

Well remember the Norah Vincent book I was talking about?

Refer here for if you don't know.

Well, in one of her chapters, she starts looking for one of those pow wow male dominated multilevel sales jobs, and the easiest of these to get without having her cover blown was obviously, DIRECT SELLING. Because nobody really gives a shit. You just sell and that's all you do. Trust me, I know.

You have no idea how I could relate to her experience with this job. Especially when she mentioned the bit about ringing the bell. Haha. Oh man, and "JUICE by you!". HAHAHA.

Those were days...

Well, at least I've unraveled the mystery of why those people in my company used to say JUICE to everything. All these years, I wondered and wondered and finally now, I discovered the truth. Such satisfaction! Hehe.

But it STILL doesn't make sense why I would want to Join Them In Creating Excitement really. It's a shit job! I mean, low pay, long hours!

But of course, this made me realize I went through the shittiest job ever and managed to survive. And it did increase my interpersonal skills. It made me feel thankful with what I have; the ability to sell and trust me, selling isn't easy. I hate it. Truly, madly, deeply. I mean it's bad enough we have to sell ourselves when we want a job but then sell myself to sell other things? Not really my cup of tea.

But after all that, I think the appropriate line for this job should be:

Join Us In Creating Excrement!

JUICE by me!

February = Short Month of Hell

So a couple of years ago, I wrote how hectic the month of March was going to be for me. Refer here.

But little would I know that it would never be as hell as this February that I am about to go through.

Well, the bulk of hell is this week really.

I have:
1) A presentation due like, in an hour.
2) Paper outline due tomorrow.
3) 10 Page Essay due on Thursday
4) Take home exam due on Friday

Next week:
1) Midterms (must do a bajillion readings)

After reading break (which won't really be a break):
1) 10 page essay due
2) Minor class assignment
3) Presentation

I'm pretty much fucked.

And the worst part is I have come down with a serious case of MALAS!

Alas, I can't wait for March...

March will be my new heaven.

Hehe.

So Little Time

So many things to say so little time to pen them down.

There's something about the ends and the beginnings of a year for me.

I lose all capabilities to concentrate on anything.

This is probably cos I'm too busy reminiscing about last year and taking my time getting used to this year. And since it takes awhile for me to get used to this year hence the lackability to get things back on track.

But after yesterday I realized that time is short and must not be wasted on 'getting used to'.

We never know when we're going to say farewell to the world and hello to the afterlife.

This guy who I used to have a crush on for a little bit just passed away yesterday. The thing is, I wasn't so close to him or anything but it's just that, it was so sudden. Out of the blue. Like, eh? You're dead?

Okay, yeah that sounds so blunt. But thats how I view death. With bluntness. I mean granted I will cry for certain deaths. But you know, we just have to face it. I mean, funnily enough, death is part of life.

He was 22. I still can't believe it really.

Anyways, it just made me realize that I can't plan my life too much.

Because planning means not being able to do secondary plans that I want to do.

I guess at the end of the day the question is: what are your priorities in life?

Because evidently we can't have em' all. So I guess we just have to go with the flow, try our best to achieve what we feel is the most important to us?

So what are your goals in life with this little time we have?

A lot of philosophers say people want to be happy. But what does it mean 'to be happy'?

And loads answer 'with love'. That at the end of the day, everyone just wants to feel loved whether self-love or loved by someone else.

My question is : why love? why does love give this happiness to people?

And to think I had that photo of me completely anti-love a couple of years ago.

Haha. Damn, I sure know how to make a statement.

Well I still love me (which is the most important next to God) but loathe loving others?

Because I end up caring too much?

Sigh.

This photo definitely still applies.

Drug Bust!

There was a drug bust in my house.

Yeah, I make it sound so nonchalant.

But honestly, its not something you laugh about. Well, I still do bits and pieces here and there. But no one knows how traumatizing shit like this can be.

I mean don't get me wrong, no one shot me in the head or anything or else I wouldn't be typing this nor did anyone hold me at gunpoint (touch wood) but well, I was still a little traumatized so yeah, give me a week.

I should be okay as soon as we change the locks.

Ok so what happened?

It was last Friday and I had actually not wanted to go out but since Erica was really persistent i was like, okay fine.

I got on the 7.40pm bus listening to my ChiPod which was playing Girls Just Wanna Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper when 3 seconds into the bus moving it stopped. I looked at the bus door to see a woman entering the bus and said something to the bus driver.

And then she walks straight to me and goes "You need to come with me" and flashes her police badge. I was like what the...

So I got off the bus.

And then the conversation went like this:

"Do you live at 311 Stannard Avenue?" she asked.

"Yes? Why is everything okay?" I asked.

She then proceeded with, "do you know the couple downstairs?"

I was like "kinda but not really actually I've only spoken to the girl like twice. Why whats wrong? The guy can be verbal abusive. Is that the problem?"

"He's been arrested..." she said.

"Oh damn..what did he do?" I asked.

"He was actually arrested because we caught him drug dealing and we have reasonable belief that there are drugs in your house. Is there anyone else in the house? Is the kid in there?"

"Oh my God (more like, holy shit in my head) no no one is home but me and her. I thought he was in too but I guess if he's been arrested its just her." I said.

"Where's Candace (my landlady)?" she asks.

"She's with her boyfriend" I said.

Then we were distracted because her partners showed up.

"Listen, we're going to have to get you to come down to the station because you live in there you have to be detained. Also we need your assistance on the layout of the house"

I was like "Um, really? But I'm meeting my friends."

"So sorry but you need to come with us. We apologize for this. You also can't contact anybody to let them know about this." they said.

"Hmm. Okay." I said.

****

And so I ended up at the police station. Not exactly happy but not upset either.

Just dazed and confused and a wee bit curious.

It's really amazing where your mind takes you when you're stuck in a cell for 3 hours.

But they did give me things to do in there.

Such as draw a layout of the house. That killed 45 minutes or so.

After that, well, I was on my own.

Sitting there I thought about the most juvenile things I've done. I pretended to be a criminal. I thought about those CSI scenes where they interrogate you and you act all in denial and shit. I thought about what would happened if I was wrongfully accused and actually had to end up in jail. I imagined what would the Malaysian Consulate need to do to rescue me. I imagined myself sleeping in a cell. I thought about how I would have to take a mug shot. Then I thought "well at least I look good tonight". Stuff like that.

****
After three hours passed, they finally let me go.

What pissed me off was they didn't send me home like they said they would!

Rat Bastards!

So I was left out in the cold at the outskirts of downtown.

I was so pissed. Walking pass the street near China Town where all the drug addicts lurked really pissed me off.

That night I hated drugs because drug addicts need drugs and where do they get them from? STUPID DRUG DEALERS.

I still don't mind weed and mushrooms though. Hehe. What? They're both edible!

Anyways, I reached downtown luckily enough my bus was still running. It was the last bus I think. Which made me so happy cos I didn't have to pay like 8 bucks for a cab ride. I was so relieved. All I could think of was going home and calling my friends and apologizing to them about what happened and then just go to bed.

****

So I get home. And I see unfamiliar cars there. Obviously the cops were still there.

So I walk up to the doorstep and the door was locked. A cop opens it and he was the cop I drew the map for and he was like "I'm sorry you're not supposed to be here yet"

"But they told me I could go!" I said.

"Yeah but we're still not done with the search yet so you can't be here for this. So sorry. Is there some place you can go?"

I was boiling mad already. All I wanted to do was fucking go home. On top of that I was using my Malaysian number so I was trying to limit my calls (but I still called anyways).

"Its 11.30 at night. I would go some place but there are no busses running!" I said.

He just had an apologetic look on his face.

"How long more is this going to take?" I asked.

"Another hour and a half I think" he answered.

Cursing under my breathe I muttered "Fine I'll be at the pub next door".

So I buggered off. REALLY PISSED AND UPSET.

**

I get to the pub which is just 2 minutes away and the pub is CLOSED.

I was so flipping upset.

I sat outside the pub on a bench in the cold in the rain. It was the most scariest feeling ever. I mean I don't mind being alone but I do mind when no one is there to help me in a fucking situation like this.

I tried phoning my friends. No one was picking up.

Until luckily, Jenn picked up my phone call.

Somehow listening to a familiar voice made me bawl for like a good split second. And then Jenn luckily had Luis with her who has a car so they came straight away to the rescue.

Sigh.

What a night it was.

As soon as they arrived I went to pick up my house keys from the cops and they asked me.

"How long have you been living here?"

"A month?" I answered.

"Did you know there were guns down there?"

I was like......fuck.

So yeah, moral of the story is, if you're going to rent out to somebody ask them if they are drug dealers cos you DO NOT want to be in a drug bust.

Trust me on this one!

Brief Book Review

Norah Vincent's Self Made Man.

An interesting book about a woman who decides to try and dress, talk and live like a man for about a year and a half so she could understand what it's like to be a man.

Obviously, she will never know what it's like to be a man.

Some bits of this book was like, what the fuck? Her assumptions on the society she tapped into was too stereotypical for me. She was too quick too judge at them. And too quick to assume things that should not be assumed. Typical of a woman perhaps. Haha.

But she points out a lot of things that men apparently go through. Like the pressures and expectations of becoming a man. Like men are taught from young to not show any form of sensitivity. Like it wasn't manly to cry. Nor was it manly to be too affectionate. Or manly to talk about emotions. Stuff like that.

I mean, when did it become not okay for men to be like this?

Didn't the days of Aristotle show men being affectionate towards men?

Anyways, she divides her observation to eight chapters. Firstly how she go started, to how she made friends, to how she attempted sex (though if guys think it's in detail, it's not), then to love, then life, then work, then self discovery and finally her journey's end.

It's interesting, but I can't say it was like OH MY GOD like she totally got it right about men. I mean, it IS at the end of the day a woman attempting to be a man not because she really wants to be a man but because she just wants to understand how men are around men. And sometimes I find her skewing her thoughts especially since her sexual orientation is in the end not towards men. Perhaps if she were heterosexual her perceptions and assumptions would have been completely different. Or if she came from a different social background altogether?

I kind of want a man's perspective on this book and ask them do they really go through stuff like this?

Of course, knowing men, they might not answer.

But I wish they would.

Wishful thinking I reckon.

The Current US President

Why is Bush so stupid?

Why is he a bigot who really, in reality, has no meaningful opinions?

Why did he win the elections twice?

He recently visited the Middle East to have some diplomatic talks bla bla bla. I'm sure it's all a cover up to make him look like a nicer man.

Perhaps he really is actually, a nice guy?

I don't know that for sure.

But God I hope they elect a better President in the next elections because I cannot stand seeing this Bush dude talk anymore shit.

Argh.

My Masakan In Canada So Far

A wise friend once said to me, if you love to eat, you can probably cook.

Yeah it's true.

I love to eat, and I can definitely cook.

I think it's brilliant how God managed to have such creativity in making us humans incredibly satisfied.

Aside from sex, how did God think of food?

It's genius!

And there's just so many kinds of food too! Furthermore the tastes range from sweet to sour to salty to spicy to oh my God mouth melting experiences! And the aroma! Oh man, don't get me started!

Anyways, I hadn't cooked in ages.

In KL, I never cooked because well, I never needed to.

But here, well, eating out would kill my budget so cooking is a must. It's good though because it domesticates me a little. Hehe.

So far my student menu consists of:

1) Brahims ready made sauce : okay, so I know that's cheating but its not like I can get all the condiments I need to make it from scratch right? unless I really look for it of which I am not going to do so because...it is a student menu.

2) Tuna Salsa Pasta : mmmm yummy!

3) Chinese fried rice: so fast to cook and so satisfyingly good

4) Toasted roast beef and cheddar cheese sandwich: my favorite lunch food

5) Roasted teriyaki chicken with rice : Mmmhmmm

6) Spaghetti Marinara: Oh enak lazat sungguh

There will be more to come!

Come share with me what you like to cook! I love trying new recipes.

:)