Tanah Tumpahnya Darahku

Kuala Lumpur is so small.

No really, it is. If you've lived here long enough you would have realized that you are bound to know someone who happens to know someone who happens to know someone who knows someone else who knows you.

Get my drift?

It's happened to me. One too many times.

It's getting a bit scary though. It makes me want to get out of KL permanently because I can't roam around freely in KL without seeing someone I know with someone else I happen to know who knows perhaps, my parents or worse my grandparents!

It basically means I can't do whatever I please.

Actually, I always knew I couldn't do what I pleased here because most of my family lives in KL therefore misbehaving could get to the elders and the elders will talk and ergh, you know what I mean.

KL seems to be getting smaller and I want out.

But wait, that's just insane talk! I love KL! And I sure as hell love Malaysia!

Truthfully, I really don't understand why any Malaysian would want to hate this country and is willing to give up their citizenship for it.

Oh well.

Doesn't matter does it? Giving up ones citizenship?

What's the big fucking deal?

Recently, there was quite a big Hoo-Ha in the media about the statistics which showed how many people had given up their Malaysian citizenship for other countries. Apparently, there were a lot of unsatisfied Malaysians. Or were there?

This article clarifies it all. It clarifies the actuality of the given statistics and the reasons as to why one should appreciate having a citizenship.

This whole citizenship issue has a lot to do with historical mambo jumbo.

So if you enjoy reading history be sure to look up the word jus soli. It's something the Malays totally protested against just before the Brits were about to give our independence. The Malays didn't think it was a good idea that anyone born in Malaysia can automatically become a Malaysian.

In the first place, why the hell were we being given independence?

Shouldn't we be free from all in the first place? Argh. One topic at a time Naz!

Okay so back to citizenship, Malaysia (the government that is), believes that we Malaysians should not simply give up our citizenships. And if we do, we shouldn't expect that we will get it back. Because we won't get it back. Because it's a big deal to them and to the country. Duh!

The article linked above written by Suhaini Aznam was quite moving for me. Well, I liked the ending where he writes:

"Malaysia has to strike a balance between sending its citizens out and imbuing them with a sense of belonging. This is what the tanah tumpahnya darah ku (this land I would die for) is all about in the first line of the national anthem.

Citizenship defines the place one calls home for life, where one rests one’s weary head after having travelled the globe. It gives one identity. It is the place to live out one’s twilight years. Ideally, it is “the best place on earth.” "

Agak emo lah.

Blame it on the PMS or too much Nasi Lemak or the fact that it's going to be 50 years of Independence this month but the fact still stands I love my country, so sue me.


You should learn to love it too.

C'est Un Secret? Mais Pourquoi?

Being Dr.Ama is quite a tough job. You are the listener of peoples' problems and at the same time you are there to try and solve it. Most of the time these problems are private problems that often require secret keeping skills.

Doctors practice confidentiality when treating their patients and I well, I, Dr.Ama (self proclaimed medicinal woman) shall try to do the same.

Actually, the question that runs through my mind is : why do we keep secrets?

Secrets have been kept for the longest time in this world. There are all sorts of secrets from every kind of situation that somehow needs to be kept from people. There even are some things out there that still remain a secret dated back to God knows how long ago...

The funny thing is, if people (other than the secret holder) itself have heard about the secret, how is it a secret anymore? Like those shows on Discovery Channel that say secrets unraveled, or the secret to the best spaghetti in the world, or the secret life of Micheal Jackson bla bla bla.

I mean, it's not really a secret anymore if people know about it is it? How do these secrets get to others in the first place?

Also, isn't it insane how some random source of secret can come to the most unlikely person?

But still, the question of the matter is, why do we keep secrets?

Well, I guess mostly its for the sake of our pride and personal space.

I mean, sometimes we just don't want people to know what we do after office hours behind the closed doors of our private homes do we? I totally get it. Like, sometimes it's inappropriate for people to know this side of you right? It's sometimes a secret that might ruin you perhaps?

Yeah, secrets.

Everyone has a secret. Even I.

I don't know how therapists and doctors are able to keep the confidentiality of their clients without thinking about each secret they keep. Perhaps, that's why people in the medical world are so dull and boring (no offense). Because they have to keep that (dull and boring) state of mind so that they don't get too excited and reveal something they shouldn't reveal? Perhaps.

But one thing is for sure : keeping a secret brings burden to ones back.

And too many secrets can sure as hell hurt ones back. Damn, I need a back massage.

*Grunt*

*Image taken from this cool interior design site.

I MUST BE E-MO

Whenever I hear the line "I miss that person so much it hurts" I feel like I want to throw up a thousand vomits because that line?

is so EMO.

But now, well, NOW, well, fucking hell. What the fuck? FUCK. Putain!

How can anyone miss anyone so much it hurts?

What the fuck is hurting anyway? How can it hurt? What is it damn it?

People are constantly missing somebody.

But why do we miss anybody?

Because we enjoyed their company? Because of the familiarity that is no longer there? Because we saw/heard/smelt something that reminded us of them which therefore led us to the thought of them?

But why would these reasons make a person feel pain?

Shouldn't they bring back good memories? Shouldn't it make that person smile and remember the good times? Shouldn't it make one feel happy?

So where's the pain?

WAIT, I KNOW. It's because YOU'RE NOT FUCKING HERE and my world isn't as fun without you.

DAMN YOU EMOTIONS! I miss too many people. I should learn to stop missing people so that I can feel better. Better yet, I should stop being so emo.

Ew, I'm so disgusted with my emo-ness. SHOOT ME. Oh God, what an emo thought.

On a lighter note please enjoy my favourite video written for the real emo kids.It always makes me feel better and less emo. Teehee.



Hehe.

Things Girls Like To Do With Their Friends : Part 1

Okay, so I have a confession.

Every morning when I go to work I look forward to two things : A text message from my babe and to see my LRT crush.

:P

Yeah, I have an LRT crush.

God knows who he is or where he's from but erm, he's hot. We see each other every morning. He gets out of the train that I get on. Sigh.

Oh My God! What am I talking about? I have a "whatever"! Hehe.

Sorry babe. Hehe. I still think of you though and I'm almost sure you're stalking some Arab chick or have another crush that you're not telling me about. It's okay, I understand. We're all animals. Teehee.

Why this came up was cos today during lunch hour with Rae and Shamaine my LRT crush ended up at my turf! (KLCC is my turf now)

I was like "Oh MY Fuggin God My LRT crush is here!"

Hahahahhaha.

Yeah stalkers, I'm stalking someone too. Actually, I'm stalking more than one person. Heh Heh.

Anyways, somehow he ended up sitting near our table. So I got to take a good look at him. Well, he is hot. I wasn't hallucinating. He's got nice eyes according to Rae. I looked and yeah, he does. Then Shamaine said he probably has an ugly voice because he's too hot to have a good voice.

Haha. I don't know. After looking at him properly I realized he's not as hot as I thought he was. I mean, he's just a crush you know?

I guess I totally had a crush on him because he reminded me of Jamie Aditya the half Aussie half Indo guy from MTVAsia and then moved on to Sync or Swim. I have such a huge crush on him because well, he's hot and I LOVE how how he portrays himself on screen (not sure if he's really like that off-screen) and the way he concentrates on his tasks in Sync or Swim was so awesome and on top of ALL that he has a nice voice!

As the Indo's would say "GANTENG BANGAT!". Hehe.

I totally wanted to marry him.

Then I found out how old he was and that he was married I was like, yeah, keep dreaming Naz.

Mimpi aja dong....

The funny part was when Rae decided to turn and look when my LRT crush was about to leave. He totally caught her (well, all of us actually) looking at him! Hahahaha.

That was priceless.

What an interesting lunchtime! I kind of felt like I was in high school again in the cafeteria (food court) where the girl has a crush on the guy and all her friends stare? Haha. Why do we girls do that? It's so strange. The guy must feel pretty erm, awkward.

But I also bet it makes the guy feel good that three hot chicks were checking him out. DON'T LIE GUYS, we know you love it. Hehe.

Anyways, it's going to be interesting to see my LRT crush again. Rae told me to go up to him and tell him that she apologizes for abruptly looking at him the way she did. Haha. Right. And when I do that I'll also add "By the way just so you know, its me who has a crush on you, not her."

Ha! Yeah right. Not going to happen.

:P

I Want I Want!

So apparently I've been tagged by Shamaine which is totally uncalled for but okay, because you rock I'll do it for you. Hehe :)

Things I want but will never get in this lifetime:

• Brad Pitt
• World peace
• My own private island
• The ability to eat like a pig and never put on weight
• The ability to fly
• Snow in Malaysia
• Obedient kids
• Everything my way (cos I'm demanding like that)
• To discover life in another universe
• To be best friends with all (I mean ALL) the most influential people of the world
• To live like a simpleton but be rich like Oprah Winfrey
• To have a Naz Appreciation Day
  
• To declare Naz Appreciation Day as a world holiday
  
• To go to heaven perhaps?
• To be happy. Like really really happy. Like the kind of happy that makes the entire world happy because my aura is so fucking happy. You know what I mean?
  

That's All!

Cravingsssss...

Banoffee Sundae - one hell of a craving

Cravings, cravings. We all have cravings.

The question of the matter is how often do we fulfill our cravings?

I usually fulfill mine as soon as I crave for it.

But sometimes, some cravings can't be fulfilled due to certain circumstances.

Certain circumstances like making one's health deteriorate. But what if (IF) this craving will help ones health improve? You know, mentally? Because we're all crazy like that? *raises eyebrows*

Ignore this post. It's for those who know about the Fat Fighters Club.

I'm going crazy due to some cravingsssss...

Bleurgh!

Good vs. Evil

Look at this painting. Isn't it serene looking?

I can never paint this. It's so pretty and so peaceful looking. Whoever painted this must have a kind gentle soul. Whoever painted this must love peace and serenity in the world.

I can never paint this because I have no skills nor vivid imagination to do such things. Unlike Hitler.

Yes, Adolf Hitler painted this.

Isn't it amazingly insane that it came from the hands of a murderer?

I was doing research on him (for some random reason) and discovered many interesting things about him. I mean, I guess I decided to research on him because there are so many jokes in reference to him and well, I just felt like understanding why.

One particular scene I totally remember that had a reference to Hitler that really made me laugh was from Family Guy : the one where he and his wife Eva Braun were about to commit suicide in the bunker in Berlin.




Hehe. So funny.

But jokes aside, Hitler was insane. Seriously, if you have time to read about him, do it. He scares the fuck out of me. I mean, under his orders millions have died. Mostly Jews. I mean hello! Holocaust?

Hmmm.

Anyways, after reading about Hitler I decided to read up on some of the most hardcore war criminals throughout the 20th century.

Of course, there's just so many of them.

But this one dude caught my eye. Mostly because unlike Hitler, he didn't kill a lot of Jews. He killed a lot of Muslims.

Željko Ražnatović aka Arkan.

For those of you who have no idea who Arkan is well, let's just say he played a huge role in the ethnic cleansing that happened during the Yugoslav Wars.

If I were to get into detail with the whole Yugoslav Wars situation, it can get really complicated but let's just make it simple : basically all these countries used to be part of this country called the Socialist Federal Republic of Yugoslavia and then they broke up sometime in 1992 due to many issues in politics, economy, culture and religion.

Anyways, Arkan was insane. But he was more of a gangster than Hitler was.

Unlike Arkan, Hitler was twisted. His mindset was pretty much out of whack. He began in his early years (according to his Mein Kampf) to have curiosity towards the Jews. And then eventually (I think) it became an obsession. Then God knows what hit him in the head one day he decided to kill them all.

It was probably triggered when he started to really believe in Darwinism and anti-semitism especially since the Jews were getting richer while the rest of Germany was suffering from the Great Depression or something. It probably made him mad to see so many people struggling.

In fact, he was one of those who struggled too. It's bad enough he didn't finish high school. Then he got rejected from art school (more than once) because they said he belonged in the school of architecture. On top of that, he couldn't get into architecture school because he did not possess the qualifications (which one needed from high school). Because of that, he suffered many years on the streets doing small jobs here and there like painting trying to make ends meet. He must've been quite a bitter man.

Compared to Hitler, Arkan had always been a gangster rebellious type. He was your typical trouble maker who stole and crap. He wasn't as bitter as Hitler but definitely still a murderer.

Indirectly, Arkan was under the orders of Slobodan Milošević. Although Arkan believed that he was there to protect the Serbs and that the ethnic cleansing was necessary, he only portrayed this character of an aggressive and brutal man in front of his soldiers. Privately, he was a kind and gentle person. I mean, he actually donates money to poor families and war orphans.

It's funny, while he invades towns, robs families, rapes the women and kill the men he uses the money that he took from them to give it to others in need?

How fucked up is that?

What is it with these murderers and having two sided personalities?

They have a really nice side and a really bad side. How can one be the same person? An artist, a murderer. A humanitarian, a criminal?

I guess the fact of the matter is nobody is born evil. And nobody is purely evil nor are they purely good. It's all about the upbringing and the environment we grow up in. The similarities that Arkan and Hitler shared was that they both came from a not so wealthy family which is why they yearn for power. And because their parents would beat them if they had done anything wrong they become numb towards brutality or something. Being abusive towards a child will fuck them up either to be an angry person or a very insecure and meek person.

So I guess while they (Arkan and Hitler) tried to be good their past haunts them to become evil at the same time. All that mixed emotions and thoughts crap shit I guess. Just like Anakin Skywalker. Sometimes I think George Lucas wrote Star Wars to reflect the current issues of the world. Heh.

To conclude, I'd like to say that we live in such a balanced world don't we? I mean, just because Hitler paints pretty pictures doesn't mean he can't kill so many people. Just because Arkan gives money to those in need doesn't mean he can't kill others for it right?


It's the good versus the evil.

*Images taken from Wikipedia

Cell Phone Shopping

I lost my cell phone. FUCK.

Perhaps some retail therapy will make me feel better.

I'm shopping for a new cell phone. And it seems the Nokia 6300 has caught my eye. It's so pretty.

Apparently people are complaining that it doesn't have 3G and that the battery doesn't last long if you're using it as an mp3 player. Also, they say that the camera isn't so clear.



Well, it doesn't matter because I don't need 3G (it's bloody expensive) and I have my ChiPod to entertain me.

As for the camera flaw, well, its a cell phone not a camera! Cameras' on cells (in my opinion) are for you to take photos that are like, on the go you know? So don't expect much from it's quality.

A camera phone is useful when: you meet this certain celebrity or whatever and you are not a camwhore therefore you don't carry your digital camera with you but hey wait a minute! you have a camera on your cell (which kinda makes you a bigger camwhore)! Yay!

And it turns out these people are selling my future cell for so cheap!

I know buying a cell on ebay seems dangerous but since it comes with a warranty and all it should be okay right? And check out the things they are including for the price they're giving! So cheap!

A lot of people are usually iffy when it comes to shopping online but for me, it's not bad at all. So far, I have bought an mp3 player and four bags and they are all in working order and perfect condition (not to mention nice too!).

You guys should try it! ;)

Les Adolescents

You know, I know I am a lot of things. But if it's anything I know I'm not, it is that I am not OLD.

Well at least, not yet.

But this post isn't about bitching about old people. It's about the fucking young people and yes, that includes me.

But not today, because I'm no longer a teenager. I'm 21. Hah.

Yes, it's about them fucking teenagers and their fucking attitude.

Yes, I shall discuss about teenagers and their so-called teenage angst.

When puberty hits, the hormones of these teenagers go seriously out of whack.

They become emotionally unstable, horny as hell and everything seems to be all about them. It's as though the world is out to get them. They become self-centered attention seeking little shit heads.

They rebel against their parents and say that its always their parents fault whenever they don't get it their way. They are (apparently) pressured amongst their friends to become "normal" or "cool" so they adapt with all the pop culture trends by dressing like the rest of their friends and doing the activities that their friends do.

The worst bit is that the activities they do are so lame i.e vandalism, breaking into the school property to do some ridiculous activity, smoking in the loo, sneaking out of the house to see their boyfriends, stealing the parents car, taking drugs, getting into fights in shopping malls with their rivals... BLUEK I feel like throwing up thinking about how lame the stories get.

Even worse is their conformity to the fashion trends i.e emo punk rock, hip hop, pop princess, or rave?!?!? Like, ooohh if you're a "hip hopper" you can't mix with the "punk rocker" or the "emo" kids are better than the "skater" boys.

"Damned kids".

Now I understand why old people say that. Sometimes teens can be such a nuisance.

Like, dude, chill man, it's not all about you and you don't necessarily HAVE to do whatever shit that everyone else does nor do you have to be an emo rebel.

You should start your own shit. Be creative for goodness sake. Don't be a fucking sheep!

And school is fucking important unless you really want to end up picking up trash as a living. The least you can do is finish high school!

Bleurgh.

Geli ah budak kecik.

Of course, there are some really good and wholesome non-retarded teens out there, but most are just pathetic and self-centered and lame.

Okay, I'm not saying everybody in high school was lame.

Nor am I saying that I wasn't lame when I was in high school. We all were (at some point or rather) lame and did some crap to be "in" or "out" of the ordinary to you know, be recognized. Because all teenagers want is to be accepted in some part of society cos you know, they are neither adult nor kid. They are awkward.

When I was a teenager, I guess I was classified as the ones that were into the whole underage clubbing shit. It was such a thrill to not get carded and be able to get into clubs wasn't it? Haha.

Yuck.

Too in a hurry to grow up I dare say? It's true. It's pathetic. We've all done ridiculous things during our teenage years. But our past experiences have thought us to become less ridiculous (I hope).

Then again, I still club. I still drink. I guess the only difference now is that my parents know what I'm doing.

Awesome! (?)

It's great to be honest with your parents. It makes me feel open and able to tell them anything. Almost anything.

The point is, teenagers are so retarded. Sometimes I wish they didn't try to act so "cool" but it is inevitable, they're just trying to fit in somewhere because they have no idea where they should fit in.

My advice to them is, there's no need to try fitting into anywhere. You're doing just fine and nobody wants to hear you whine about how sucky high school is. Because actually, high school is fun. It's just how you see it. So suck it up and get over it because the real world? Is something to whine about.

Gah.

Get To Know Our Neighbours

I hate my boss.

Okay that is a serious lie. Its just that I had nothing to do today and so yeah, got really really bored and yeah, ended up at Xiaxue's site and well, actually, maybe I should thank my boss.

Because I figured out today that DAMN! Singaporeans are weird. Then again, a lot of Malaysians are too.

But really, I thought Xiaxue was weird but then I read her recent post, which featured people she claims are the most disgusting B**ggers in Singapore and well you'd think she was bias but Oh God No! they are ALL WEIRD.

I'm sure there are some interesting Singaporean b**ggers out there who aren't weird but honestly, fuckin 'ay scottie, I still don't understand why there are those who write complete and utter CRAP and they are actually famous as fuck?

Maybe I'm being bias.

I'm sure they have written somewhere in their b**g about something meaningful and informative (if not to others to themselves at least) and yeah of course in reality they can write about whatever they want (freedom of speech, its their b**g bla bla bla) its just my concern is still why the fuck do people like reading shit like that?

And when I mean shit like that I mean writing shit like :

why my boyfriend hasn't called me, or why did my boyfriend give me a missed call, or school is boring or this dumb bitch in this other b**g is bitching about me, or WORST, take tons and tons of photos of themselves (and trust me they aren't even artistically attractive).

So petty.

Nothing more interesting is itttt? Kannneeynaaaaa...

Some of them are still young but bloody hell young people, impress the old and show them we're not fucking retarded for Christ's sake? Just because you're 17 doesn't mean you have to have the mentality of a high school student. In fact, don't get me started on teenagers and their lame teenage angst. There's no such thing as teenage angst. It's all in the mind!

Okay, that's not fair of me to say.

But it did make me conclude that they are so mainstream (Singaporeans) because the things they write about bore the hell out of me. Lack of culture. Lack of character. Lack of heritage appreciation. Lack of color within personality. Lack of unity within race (not that Malaysia doesn't lack that but I definitely think it's more hardcore there). Lack of I don't know, umph!?!

I haven't been to Singapore in ages and I really want to go but every time people I know come back from there the answers are the same : it's damn clean. good to party. good to shop too but a bit too expensive unless you go during the sale time. but also be careful to not break the law because they are super strict.

Blah. Where's all the adventure man? What happened to going on crazy road trips or trips chilling by the beach? Okay, fine. They're not such a big country. Can't blame them there. They should have sticked with Malaysia if they are complaining about their land size and population problems.

Xiaxue may have bitched about KL and all and hey! we do it too but we all know Malaysia ain't that small so lucky for us, there's other parts of Malaysia we can have fun at and seriously, at the end of the day it's who you go with that makes any trip fucking awesome irregardless of the horrible experiences.

She should be friends with me. I'll teach her how to party! Haha.

Anyways, the only interesting bit about Singapore to me is the fact that I am observing how this society interacts and well, it's just weird. They're so blah.

It's no wonder the rate of suicide in Singapore is higher than normal.

Or maybe I'm just bias.

Perhaps its their up-their-ass laws that are making them so mainstream and "sterile"(quoted from a Singaporean who moved to Malaysia).

Weird.

30 Random Things About Naz

I'm feeling really shitty these days.

And one way to cure this shitty shit is to remember all the little funny things about myself that can make me happy. Even if it's just for a minute.

Today is a Me day. Have fun stalkers!

30 random things of Naz that you don't know off:

1. she has a secret b**g
   
2. she has a mole on her lip
3. she likes reading
4. she snores
5. she has a baby (pillow)
6. she likes eating chocolates for breakfast
7. she likes the smell of cigarettes and cigars but doesn't smoke it
   
8. she likes the smell of coffee but doesn't drink it
   
9. she needs her room to be super cold to sleep
10. she reads magazines and newspapers starting from the back
11. she loves picking up her clean clothes from the laundry and putting them back in her cupboard
12. she has a favorite place to stand in the Star LRT
13. she likes listening to her chipod while watching people go down the escalator at Putra LRT's Masjid Jamek
14. she has a folder for all her favorite text messages
15. she gets nightmares if she doesn't wash her feet before she goes to bed
16. she needs a good half an hour to physically get out of bed in the morning
17. she likes staring at the clouds
18. when she was small she wanted to be a storm chaser
19. she doesn't like to iron clothes
20. she appreciates when time goes slowly on weekends because it means monday is still far away
21. she can't stand the sound of the motorcycle engines
22. she loves it when it is windy
23. she loves looking down from a really high place
24. she doesn't know how to whistle
25. she doesn't really know how to snap her fingers either
26. she loves lying down on the cold marble floor on a hot day
27. she likes listen to drunk people talk
    
28. she loves flying in planes because of the compact mininess to things
29. she enjoys lying in bed the entire day on sundays
30. she hates knowing whats right and whats wrong because it gives her a conscience

Anything else you want to add?

Feel free to do so. In fact, I recommend you do this to yourself too if you're having a shitty day.

Cheers!

Democracy in Malaysia : Myth Or Reality?

I always thought I already wrote about democracy on my fuckspot.

I could have sworn I wrote about democracy somewhere.

Perhaps I submitted it as an essay for my Poli. Sci. Critical Thinking class.

Yeah, I think I did. That was an awesome class.

Whatever it is, I always loved questioning : is there such thing as democracy?

Since ancient times, people dreamed of unity in a say. The Greeks created the word democracy hoping that this would somehow become a reality for its people.You know how in My Big Fat Greek Wedding the dad goes "the Greeks created this word and that word...."?

Well, democracy is a word they did create.

The origins of this word actually mean "people" (demos) "rule" (kratos) : demokratia.

The concept of democracy is basically that everyone has a say and then they banter and argue discuss about issues that are at hand until they come to an agreement through voting.

There are many kinds of democracy.

But I'm looking at its one true meaning (that the people rule) and if we use its one true meaning then sometimes, I don't think democracy applies.

Even though countries say they live in a democracy, we'd see that it isn't necessarily true.

I feel sad that we use the term democracy like it really exists because technically, it doesn't.

I'll narrow down this argument to well, Malaysia.

We Malaysians (if you're familiar with Malaysian politics) are living in a one party controlled country.

Not that I'm complaining.

I mean, If you guys are unhappy I'd like to see you take over the country.

As far as I see, in recent years there had only been two other parties from the opposition side (besides what happened on May13th) that actually brought a minor impact (which scared the ruling party for a bit) : Parti Keadilan Rakyat (PKR) and Parti Islam SeMalaysia (PAS).

Other than that, Barisan Nasional (BN) pretty much wins.

There isn't much to complain about them. If you don't know what parties BN consists of please read here.

Personally I think they've done an okay job. We can all complain (because humans are never satisfied) but stop complaining for a second and look around. Yes, one way or another BN probably helped build this shit because well, that's why they are the ruling party right?

Anyways, I'm not promoting BN because the point of this whole post is does democracy in Malaysia REALLY exist or not?

Does it?

Of course not.

Because anyone who votes for the opposition party will not have a say. Ever. Okay maybe I'm exaggerating. Maybe they do have some say in some things. But not everything.

If I'm not mistaken in the parliament, when issues are brought forth the opposition may try to question the ruling party's ways of administering the government but the ruling party may also pretend they didn't hear it by saying something like "fuck off and shut up" in a nice way.

Anyone who thinks being on the opposition side can bring some change should just keep dreaming. It's been 50 years. And we're still under the same government that started it all. If we're going to change the political scene in Malaysia it's going to take some real radical thinker to do so.

But if we want to make change now (well, not now now but sooner then later) what do we do again? I've said it once and I'll say it again : If you can't beat 'em join'em!

Ergh.

Controlling Chaos?

For the past year or so I have been an avid reader of other b**gs.

Some are interesting, some are bimbo-ish, some are deep, some are fucking hillarious, some are political and some are just downright twisted. But to me, they give me a dose of their minds and man, do I love reading through people's minds. Full of color. It enriches my mind with more colorful thoughts.

Yeah, I'm twisted like that.

Anyways, about a few months ago, I was watching Al-Jazeera and they were talking about how b***gers in Egypt get arrested for writing issues about the country that were possibly lies, or politically controversial and crap.

We all know this I'm sure : It's happening around the world, even in Malaysia.

Of course, people protest and of course, it has now become a human rights/freedom of speech issue.

It's like, everyone is asking why the fuck can't they say what they want to say and all that? Like, what are you hiding government? Bla bla bla.

Honestly, I've read tons and tons of b**gs that are making noise about this issue and yeah, I agree that we should all have freedom of speech and crap.

But I can't help but wonder why would the government or higher authorities or whatever have the need to conceal certain facts/evidence/stories from the general public?

Could it be because it could create some chaotic situation that could spiral into a war or some diabolical shit like that?

Don't you ever wonder that perhaps what you are writing could change a person's mind to become a cold blooded murderer or a terrorist or some lame shit like that? Do you not wonder that perhaps, you are important to others and that what you say really does go through that head of theirs?

Take PolPot for instance.

That dude, did exactly what the governments are trying to prevent today : some kind of crazy insane act like killing millions because of some insane mindset he truly believed in.

Humans are so powerful in thinking.

It's funny though. We're not even using most bits of our brain and look at the shit that runs through our minds?

Come on, both you and I know you've thought of at least one SICK thought. Or it might not be sick to you but sick to the masses.

That's why (in my opinion), the government chooses to "control" what comes out to/from the masses.

Trust me, I am totally against it.

But studying political science has helped me understand that sometimes some things need to be controlled/concealed from the masses because it could cause some chaotic reaction.

I cringed at the fact that I just said that.

But it's true. Looking back at history, people like Pol Pot reached out to the masses. The bendul (easily stray minded) masses. They believed him easily. And look how many people died? And they killed the smart ones too. I mean WHAT THE FUCK? How the hell did he convince the "dumb" people that the "smart" people are bad?

Heck, how did Hitler convince his army to kill the Jews?

How does one convince one to kill in the first place?

I'll tell you how. With powerful words. With charisma. With spirit.

It's fucking scary I swear. BUT THIS is why we have to be careful with what we say.

We all say we'd like the truth but really, can we handle the truth?

Some can. But most won't. It's like a domino effect. The lamb herd story.

All you need is a huge impact. A push. A nudge. A leader.

One domino falls, all dominoes fall. One lamb goes this way and the rest will follow.

But of course, you'll have some of them dominoes that refuse to fall and black sheep that refuse to follow.

So at the end of the day, the question of the matter is, where do we draw the line of what we can and cannot say to the masses? How much of the truth are we supposed to reveal if it is supposedly needed to be concealed?

That, I do not know. Perhaps you can tell me.

But yes, sometimes those in power are afraid to lose power therefore they choose to disallow exposure to the masses that might potentially ruin them. They'll even arrest you if you try to. Hey, at least they don't kill you like in some countries.

Oh wait, I forgot about that Altantuya chick. Hehe.

Yes, I am against that.

So to conclude, I do understand government why sometimes you arrest people for certain things they say or write about because you are taking precautions towards these people that could potentially cause some sort of chaotic shit.

But honestly government, where do we draw the line of concealment?

Would you perhaps like to draw us a bloody line so that we all know what to say and what not to say? And PLEASE don't give us a general outline because clearly, many of us are benduls (straight minded?) like that.

Be specific!

Perhaps if you could show us that you are not power hungry scumbags we'd completely devote ourselves to making this country a better place? I mean, most of the time I don't think you guys are assholes because of all the opportunities we've received but really, arresting people randomly because they apparently had something uh-oh (officially a secret?) in their b**g? Not cool.

Hey before you decide to arrest me (not that there should be any reason to arrest me), I'm speaking as a youth here. Both you and I know the old ones will die and you're going to eventually need some good forward minded thinkers that can bring the country to a developed state but currently, you are suppressing their thoughts which is definitely, not cool.

So yeah, help us, help you.

I'd start with your education system.

That's my say.

Random Shit Rolls Out of My Head

So I was going through my saved text messages on my phone.

Looking through it made me see I have the tendency to write crap on my phone when I have nothing to do. I decided to delete them off my phone which is why I'm documenting them here.

Enjoy. It will make you realize I am thoroughly insane in the head. But it doesn't matter because I know you love me. Hehe.

Random words written by Nadzirah Hashim:

"Imperfection is what makes perfection"

"People come and people go so learn to welcome and learn to let go"

"How can words not matter if they are said but matter when they are written? If this is so, then why do we speak at all? It is irrelevant for one to say what they say as they speak does not matter because some of the best words spoken today are thought out because they spoke. Of course, written words are better thought out and this is due to the fact that it was well composed. But aren't written words also technically spoken in ones head? If not, how do we compile it to help people understand if they are JUST words? Above all, if words we speak daily are just words then really why speak at all? Isn't it best if we say nothing?"

"When I write about stuff it just gets all emotional and philosophic. Its funny how I mix those thoughts into one because philosophy is about reasoning your thoughts with common sense and logic and emotions are thoughts that can sometimes be thought of as irrational thinking. What could this mean then? That my philosophic thoughts are just irrational emotions? Perhaps I'm just full of shit. Well, most of us are."

"One should learn to appreciate what they have. Something is better than nothing so learn to live and love with what you have. The humans' biggest weakness is to never be happy with what they have. How I wish this could be rid off. Sigh."

"I always end up falling for those who are out of reach..."

"...He has almost managed to penetrate this stone cold heart of mine. Almost."

"...God probably has bigger plans for me. Great. Bring it on! I am waiting."

You have just read through the very weird mind of Nadzirah Hashim Natt.

Mini Travel Log : Langkawi

I was in Langkawi last week and I must say it was one of the best holidays evAr.

So here's a mini travel log:

5.7.2007, Day 1 : Late Start

The rest of the crew had arrived earlier during the day except for me and Di.

We were scheduled to arrive Langkawi at 1950 hours but due to the flight delay we arrived somewhere around 2130 hours I think which totally sucked cos by the time we arrived we couldn't do much. So we spent the night playing taboo with the crew which turned out to be fucking fun! :D personal favorite word guesses are : knob, jim carey and the spice girls. Hahaha. Priceless.

After the games we decided to retire in hopes to get up early for some tanning in the morning.


6.7.2007, Day 2 : Mundane Weather

Due to the crappy weather we couldn't do our whole tanning process.

And we were all up pretty late and ate at the Breakfast Bar on Cenang street which was reasonably cheap. I highly recommend ordering "A couple of sausages" (thats what it says on the menu) as a side order cos they're quite tasty.

But despite the crappy weather we weren't going to let that affect our holiday so we went booze shopping and then went back to the beach for a banana boat ride which was thoroughly brutal but fun. Oh, because of the crappy weather I got to wear my new swimsuit because I wouldn't get an awful tan line :) Yay!

The banana boat ride murdered our bodies. We took an afternoon nap which ended up becoming a really long one.

After our long ass nap we had dinner at Sun Cafe. Food was fucking excellent especially the Chicken Cordon Bleu. And the toilet was damn stylo. I just realized we didn't SS inside that toilet but oh well.

After dinner we ended up at Raggae Bar. Fucking awesome place. The live band was amazing. We all loved the guy on the bongos cos he's so freaking carefree. I mean, the band's set isn't even done and yet he decides to go and take a break!?! haha. And to top it all off he's got dreadlocks up to his knees, a huge belly and wears pants that reach his bum line. We all loved him. The night was going fine until a bunch of annoying people turned up (not going to start bitching) so we left.

Got back to the hotel and it was pretty late so we all ended up going to bed because our bodies still hurt from the brutal banana boat ride.


7.7.2007, Day 3 : Extreme Everything

We woke up to find the sun somewhat shining. However the shine didn't last that long so we ended up eating at Red Tomato for breakfast which of course was awesome. Everyone tried the banoffee and agreed that it was fucking amazing (thank you, I know). We were extremely full but determined to end up at the cable car place before the weather got shitty.

As we got to the cable car place the weather was getting near shitty. But I guess lighting a doobie in the cable car singing happy songs while making happy jokes made all problems go away. Hehe.

By the time we got off the cable car and trekked down towards the suspension bridge there was no blue sky but only gray clouds. We looked at the open ocean and could see this blanket of clouds headed directly at us. Being high happy and all we were like, "oh! let's see what will happen when the clouds get nearer!". And so we waited and lo behold! I guess you can say I know what it feels like to be in a cloud and I have to say, it was fucking exhilarating. Seriously, I think that was an opportunity not many could ever experience. Eventually, the security people asked us to go back to the cable car tower or hut or whatever. It was probably a good idea too since we were soaking wet and freezing our butts off and we were pretty much getting nippy. Haha.

Left the cable car feeling throughly satisfied. It was definitely worth my RM15.

We got back to the hotel chilled out and looked at some of the stuff selling on Cenang street. We (me, Aina, Afiq and Di) ended up at Debbie's the Irish Pub across the street from our hotel for some beers and THE BEST CHIPS IN THE WORLD.

Later on, we had one of those by the beach makan which turned out to be delicious too. I have no idea what that place was called but yummy.

After dinner we decided to play circle of death and any other games that came to mind. After all that we swam in the ocean which was pretty scary but I guess when you're intoxicated nothing seems scary.

The night ended at 0300 hours (I know this because I was supposed to phone someone at that time of the hour but I passed out fell asleep).


8.7.2007 Day 4 : And Then There Were 4...

Again the weather in the morning was shitty (it rained) so Aina couldn't get much of a tan.

Because of the rain, we all got up pretty late and by the time we did Aina and Afiq already had to check out of their room. But before they left they couldn't resist having another meal at Red Tomato which again, was good.

After they left (which I still think was too early) the sun came up LIKE FUCKING MAGIC. So me, Di, and Rachel got to do some tanning in the evening. But I wasn't feeling too good due to the insane intoxicated night before so I stayed in bed for a bit.

Soon after, Sha2 decided to rent a scooter so he and Rakella took a ride somewhere while Di decided to chill by the beach with her friends who had just arrived. Me? I was taking some sunset photos then meandered off to Debbie's for some early dinner with Sha2 and Rakella. Again, please eat their chips. They are orgasmic. In fact, their fish and chips are also so good.

At night, we decided to watch Family Guy the movie. I wandered off for awhile to call my babe and then after the movie we chilled at the little hut by the beach listening to Rakella's ipod music. Ah, bliss.

The night ended around 0300 hours because it rained. Boo.


9.7.2007 Day 5 : Boo...

The morning came really bright! There was sun! Woohoo!

And we managed to get really tanned. Well, I did at least. Me and Rakella got to experience the most hardcore waves in Langkawi (note: personal opinion). Seriously, it was so hardcore we didn't want to play anymore.

In the midst of the hardcore wave, someone injured himself and erm, yeah. That was not cool.

After all that we ended up having lunch at this place called Adda Maya which was not bad.

Then we chilled at the beach hut until it was time to catch a cab to the airport. Boo.

Flight was delayed for 15 minutes but Cho Tai Ti was there to accompany us. It was a pretty full flight but we managed to get the famous Air Asia Nasi Lemak. Not many others did. Hehe too bad.

Arrived in KL around 2130 hours feeling all sad and shit. Boo, back to reality.


Just want to say that I had the funnest time with the people I went with. It was insanely funny fun crazy and I would never trade those moments for anything else.

Sigh.

Fuck Fair

So I just came back from an awesome holiday. Seriously, it was incredibly awesome.

I'm so fucking tanned I'm pretty much the exact shade as Milo.

Yes, Milo the drink. Mmm delicious I am. Teehee.

I say delicious cos I'm totally against being fair.

Fair people look dead. You can't even see them in photographs because they look overexposed. Of course this is prior to putting on some make up. Obviously if they put on make up they can achieve that glowing look by shading the corners of their cheeks or putting some eyeliner and eyeshadow etc. But us tanned people don't need as much make up as they do cos we have a natural glow. So when we tanned people take a photo with a fair person (both without wearing make up), naturally the tanned one would look MUCHO better!

By the way, I'm not trying to separate the tanned and the fair but you will see that in Asia, it is what most of the Asians want to be : fair.

I curse any whitening product along with their advertising campaigns.

I mean, just because the chick uses the whitening product the guy notices her?

NENEK KAU lah.

It's like, is that ALL it takes to be noticed? Being fair? It's ridiculous! I mean I know it's just an ad but hello! This is such a SKINCIST (did I just make up a new word?) statement! What if that person was dark and was always teased as a kid for being dark? wouldn't this ad ruin their self-confidence? Wouldn't that ad make them feel like to get the guy they want they have to be fair?

It is pathetic for them to think like that and this is all the fucking whitening product company's advertising team's fault! ERGH.

I sense the evil media at work. ARGH.

I could go on forever with how disgusted I am with these products and their ad campaigns. But at the end of the day there's no point because most Asians want to be white because they've been brought up to believe that being fair is beautiful.

IDIOTS.

Funny thing is, if you look at North America, everybody would rather be tanned than look white! While the Asians strive to achieve fairness in skin the North Americans strive to get that so-called exotic look.

Funny yeah?

I guess humans are just never satisfied with what they have.

Oh well.

Xia Shooting

I can't keep my eyes open. And It's been like this since Monday. All I want to do is SLEEP!!!

Thank God I'm going to Langkawi tomorrow.

Yeah, taking Friday and Monday off to go on a holiday with my 7 on the 7th buddies (you know who you are) and their respective boyfriends. Oh just in case you're wondering (JUST IN CASE) I'm not bringing a guy I'm bringing Di which should be better cos I wouldn't want to bring a random guy now would I? Haha ;P

Which reminds me, so I was really really bored today. So bored that it came up to the point where being a judgemental biyotch on friendster was dead boring. Hence, I decided to visit Xiaxue's site (a Singaporean girl who looks like a major bimbo but has this really famous fuckspot which I don't know why people like to read) to see what was new with her.

Well, I got there and there's not much to say except that she's still annoying looking as hell. Still short and still full of herself. And still I wonder why she wins best fuckspot awards in ASIA?!??!

I mean, why isn't Kenny Sia the winner? Or other people (who actually contests themselves for that kind of shindig) for that matter?

Do we Asians like reading crap online instead of something solid, entertaining and informative? ARE YOU ASLEEP YET COS I'M BEING ALL PHILOSOPHICAL? haha.

Anyways, you should check Xiaxue out and let me know where you stand.

Are you:

a) The ones who enjoy reading it because you love it
b) The ones who enjoy reading it because you wanna bitch about how perasan this girl is
c) The ones who think she should die and rot in hell
d) The one who are wondering how she earns a living by just running a fuckspot that talks about nonsense.
e) The ones who just don't give a shit

For me, I guess I stand at d). I still am baffled how people actually want to:

a) Use her site to advertise
b) Actually pay money to advertise at her site!
c) Believe she will bring in better business for them?

Wow. I mean, maybe she has helped some these companies. Maybe. I wonder who reads her fuckspot regularly (as in age group, nationality etc.). As for me, like I said, i read it when i'm REALLY REALLY BORED.

Xiaxue's tagline : Everyone's reading it!

...even Naz when she can no longer keep her eyes open!

WARNING: Might get annoyed with her keperasananness after awhile. I can never read more than one post. It's enough for me to throw a knife at someone or aim a bazooka at the nearest pink outfit i see. But at the end of the day, read it when you're truly and utterly B-O-R-E-D.

I wonder if Nic Huli can spell that?

Hehe.

My Favourite Entrepreneur

You know, if it's any entrepreneur whom I truly admire in Malaysia it would definitely have to be, Tony Fernandes.

This came across my mind today when I had to book flights with AirAsia for my grandparents. There was a problem with the payment using my mum's Mastercard so I had to call their customer service.

It turns out that not all Mastercards can be used to pay for the tickets via the internet. This varies on the bank the card was issued from. Like apparently if your Mastercard was issued at Southern Bank or CIMB you might have a problem buying tickets from AirAsia. And I found out all this from their very friendly customer service people.

Anyways, I bought the tickets via telephone and the itinerary was emailed to me within a minute of me talking to the customer service people. I was like, wow. So fast, so efficient. And I didn't have to repeat myself a hundred times with spellings and stuff. So good!

I mean, THAT is how it should work TELEKOM.

So yeah, I totally think Tony deserves the Malaysian CEO of the year award more than the CEO of Telekom Malaysia. If I'm not mistaken he probably already got one and if he hasn't somebody shoot me.

I mean he totally turned nothing into something. He salvaged what used to be a government owned airline (which was dying by the way) with his own money (and borrowed some as well) and then managed to turn it over so well that he finished paying all his debts within a year of launching the airline which was, mind you, just after 9/11 when nobody wanted to fly which is totally ironic because AirAsia's tag line is: Now Everybody Can Fly.

Malaysia needs more people like Tony Fernandes.

Tony Fernandes is a forward-thinker. A risk taker. A leader. A smart man at that.

A true entrepreneur.

So I hope whatever your dream is, you ought to make it happen, even if it means taking a big giant leap because that's what Tony did and look where he is now!

So fucking awesome.

*Image of Tony Fernandes taken from Wikipedia

Minah Maintain Gedik

When one is bored and in a extremely bitchy mood, one can't help but be a slave to friendster.

But what is it about friendster that is so exciting? How can it kill boredom and satisfy my bitchy needs? Let's analyze shall we:

1. There are interesting written profiles with horrific English skills that can tickle me till the cows come home. moohhhooohhoooohooo. hehe.
   
2. I get to be observant of people's smiling and posing patterns which allows me to further analyze what features make them look good and what doesn't.
   
3. I get to see who's wearing what right and wrong.
4. I get to see that some people are such social climbers its sick.
5. I get to see some ass kissing bitches
6. I get to read the psychoticness that certain people have

To sum it up, I basically become a big judgmental biyotch. Ah, such fun it is.

Anyways, as I was being the big judgemental biyotch yesterday, I couldn't help but notice the amount of Minah Maintain Gedik that exist out there. Online and offline.

I guess I thought about all this when I was at the LRT station yesterday and this (I'm sorry) tudung bitch cut my queue. How rude. And then after she cuts queue she looks at herself in the mirror like she did something proud. BURN! And because I was standing in front of her I could see what she was typing to her friend on text msg. Bleurgh. it's those typical things you read on fucking channel @15 on Astro.

"ailebiu"

"tenkiu"

"babai"

GROSS.

I don't understand why can't they just type the correct way. Gedik. Minah Maintain Gedik.

Yuck.

They've bastardized the English language. Now I know how the French feel when the Americans pronounce all the R's and the S's in the French words. C'est Horrible.

These Minah Maintain Gedik are not all like this.

I mean, some of them can actually speak and spell fine in the English language. But some of them are the types that like to maintain one kind of face only when they smile. Some make it a point to befriend 'pretty' (I leave an inverted comma there because I cannot actually say that all these so-called pretty girls are pretty) girls cause it makes them feel cool by leaving comments on these 'pretty' girls pages as though they've been best friends like, forever. And then some also cover their mouth with their hands when they laugh. Come on, you know you've met these kind of girls. And I know, YUCK.

Look, I have no hate towards these girls. I just don't understand why they do it. It's like so, ew.

I mean imagine me behaving like that? YES, GROSS.

So here are my problem solving methods for these Minah Maintain Gedik:

Spelling Lessons

• If you don't know how to spell the word correctly, use a language you're familiar with. What's wrong with saying "saya cinta awak", "terima kasih" or "selamat tinggal"? Think it's too long to type? Then complain to Dewan Bahasa! If you say you type it cos it shortens your text messages you are lying. There's a fine line between just typing gedik and short form typing. Observe: if you had wanted to say "I love you" you could have typed "I <3 U"
  

Vary Your Smile

• God granted you with teeth. Lucky you! So smile with it. It's probably prettier. Since you're so vain anyway you can practice in the mirror. But please vary it. One type of smile shows your character is so predictable. Live a little, smile differently.

Suck Your Own Ass

• Why are you adding a random 'pretty' girl on friendster and kissing a 'pretty' girls ass by leaving a 'compliment' on her page so that technically, she'll (perhaps) write you something back? Sigh. Sometimes its best to kiss your own ass so you won't bother others. Unless of course, you really genuinely mean to give someone a compliment but then again, if you're a Minah Maintain Gedik it's most likely you don't give without wanting something back.
  

Keep Your Hands Away From Your Mouth

• If you're so pretty (according to you that is), why do you cover your pretty mouth with your hands when you laugh? If you think you have a pretty mouth and when you laugh you look good, remove those hands from your mouth and laugh away.
  

With all this, you will hopefully become LESS of a Minah Maintain Gedik and eventually learn to let loose because honestly, life is short so live it a little! It's okay to be a little less carefree!

Cheers!

Telekom : Still Evil

I never used to make so many long distance phone calls until recently.

I mean, the last time I bought this many calling cards was when I was in Canada.

Those were the days where me and Margy would have discussions on which IDD card was worth buying. I mean, I'd usually just go and buy the 7-11 card but honestly you'll discover others like Bravo and Bell who would claim they have better rates. Yada Yada Yada bacically there was a healthy competition going on between different telecommunication companies.

But here, in Malaysia. There's not much competition going on in the telecommunications sector.

Why?

Because fucking Telekom Malaysia controls it all.

I know I've bitched about Telekom Malaysia before. But that doesn't mean I can't do it again.

Recently, a very demanding and awesome friend of mine could not get her internet to work at her place. BIG MISTAKE FOR TELEKOM. My friend gave the biggest bambu session to the customer service in Telekom Malaysia because they were SO SLOW with fixing her internet connection.

But initially, that didn't really make any difference. I mean, they said they'd send a technician "right away" thinking perhaps she will be patient and eventually let it go. BUT NO. She did what every customer should do when they are experiencing horrible customer service. Go there and bang tables and demand to see a manager or better: kidnap a technician and make him fix the damn thing until he gets it right. HA!

She made such a big fuss that I think Telekom hates her now.

But why not? Why can't we the customers, complain? It's a consumer's right damn it.

What disgusts me is that TM Net promotes their damn Streamyx like it's the best thing that's happened since the birth of technology!

Just read their introduction:

Experience the Internet like never before

With tmnet streamyx, you get broadband access service, which stays perpetually connected to the Internet with speed bandwidths of 384kbps up to 2mbps.

So, now when you download your favourite songs, movies, music videos and even accessing your favourite websites, you won't have to wait for ever and ever, leaving you with more time to enjoy the Internet as you like.

Broadband your life today and experience the World Wide Web like never before.

I'd like to highlight that they are over-exaggerating but as if I needed to highlight THAT. I mean, granted they need to sell their product right? But sometimes they ought to be honest.

Like the line, "you won't have to wait for ever and ever"?

Come on. Try something a little bit more honest like "you won't have to wait as long as you used to". I mean, this would imply the honest truth because honestly, you still actually need to sit around to wait for the damn thing to finish downloading.

And as I read the next line "leaving you with more time to enjoy the Internet as you like" I'm rather baffled. This is honestly an unnecessary line to include because I don't know anyone who does only one thing at a time when they are online.

I mean tell me, who doesn't chat, check their email, download music and watch youtube all at the same time when their online? Yes, this is what makes the internet slow so perhaps what TMnet should do is come up with a technology that has more bandwidth such as CABLE instead of DSL.

That might help.

And by the way, I feel like the England to that whole Intro seems rather, off.

Okay I'm ranting and ranting I know. Maybe because it's Monday, or maybe because I can't wait for Thursday or maybe it's coming to that time of the month. Who knows. But one thing is for sure:

Telekom Malaysia is STILL evil.

The Gold Digger Digs & Digs But Cannot Spell

If you guys have been reading my fuckspot religiously, you would know that I've been writing a story about this Gold Digger named Nic Huli who comes from Kelanistan. For those of you who missed it read here.

The saga continues...

The Chronicles of the Gold Digger : Episode 2

Years have gone by since Nic Huli had come to the big city Kul. She was now a master at deceiving old dirty gremlins with families into covering her with copious amounts of gold that it was almost as if she could outdo King Midas himself. But of course, King Midas still wins because Nic Huli is just gross.

Speaking of gross, many people in the suburb village off shore of Kul believed that Nic Huli was quite an idiot. It was bad enough that she had become a stinkin' family stealer/gold digger but to be a rightful idiot too? The situation was priceless.

But to not point fingers a brave villager named Zand decided to see how idiotic Nic Huli was. But it turned out Zand did not have to plan a cunning plan to do so as Nic Huli soon revealed that in fact, she was an idiot.

"Zand, I have to reveal this to you. I cannot spell. Nor am I tech savvy enough to figure out how to find a magical tool that will allow me not to look like an idiot. But somehow I believe you will be able to help me. If you must know, the gold has clouded my brain and now, I can only spell GOLD." said Nic Huli.

"HOLY MOTHER OF GOD, We hit the jackpot! What will the suburbs off shore say?" Zand thought to herself but kept composure because of years of experience dealing with idiots like Nic Huli.

"Nic, you can't be as idiotic as many would say. Okay, I shall test you. Spell 'good'." said Zand.

"G-O-L-D" Nic Huli spelt aloud.

"No, you're close but not too close. Replace the L with an O and you will get Good" Zand showed her by writing it on a paper.

"Oh! So all I need to do is always replace this letter and I will be correct?" asked Nic Huli with excitement.

"Yes. Now, try spelling a harder one. Hmmm. Let's see, how about 'idiot'. Can you spell that?" Zand asked her.

"G-O-L-D" Nic Huli spelt again.

"Oh bugger, this is going to be a long and painful journey" said Zand.

And so the journey of Nic Huli not becoming an idiot was indeed a long and painful one for Zand that in the end she decided to give up and let Nic Huli retain her idoticness for it was good comedy for the noble people of the suburbs off shore.

The End.